Have you ever been rudely ignored before? You must have felt very bad about it. What was your behavior towards that person afterwards? As the topic already states, never force anyone to talk to you. If you ever feel like you’re forcing yourself on anyone, let the person go. The fact that you feel you have to apply force shows that relationships should be put on hold.
In every relationship, there are similarities between those involved. It is these similarities or shared likeness that births a relationship in the first place. There are different things involved when it gets to a point where it seems that coercing the person to talk to you may arise. It could mean that you have to exercise patience with the person or better still, the person doesn’t want to have a relationship with you.
When it comes to relationships, allowing things to go at their natural pace is the best thing to do. Relationships among humans can be dicey when not properly defined. We will be discussing reasons why should never force anyone to talk to you
Why You Should Never Force Anyone To Talk To You
As complex as human relationships can be, it is important to set clear boundaries. These clear boundaries can only be set when the relationship is defined. For example, consider the relationship between your boss at work and yourself. In the workplace, roles are assigned to different people according to their office and capabilities.
In carrying out those roles, a level of relationship is made and preserved. This level of relationship allows for the peaceful and successful carrying out of every assigned task. Let’s go on to discuss the reasons why you should never force anyone to talk to you.
1. The Person Simply Doesn’t Like You
People struggle with acceptance so much that they resort to begging people for it. And these people they struggle to get acceptance from don’t necessarily like them. The truth is, not everyone will like you, and not everyone will understand you. In the midst of all of that, there are people who genuinely like you. There are those who are amazed by you; give them your attention instead.
2. The Person Most Probably Wants To Left Alone
Everyone goes through ups and downs from time to time in their lives. It is important to know when to hold back and just leave the person alone. This depends on the person involved. Most introverts like their alone time, and they would like you more when you give them that space. This is when understanding is of utmost importance.
The time you give that person could be used for introspection. Which will enable the person to come back to you as a better person.
3. The Person Might Just Be Very Busy
Although this might sound like an excuse, it most likely turns out to be true in certain cases. There are times when the demands of life, work, family or even academics can be too much. And there would be little or no time for chit-chats. At these times, the person might need you to understand his or her situation.
For instance, you are preparing for a very important exam. Would you have enough to spend with your friends or even your loved ones? So times like this require you to be more understanding of the person.
4. The Person Doesn’t Value You
Value can be communicated by the kind of investment made in it. Investment could be in form of money, time or resources. When someone values you, he invests his resources in you. Most likely, his times. Someone who values you doesn’t need to be coerced into talking to you. Communication will flow seamlessly to favour both parties.
5. The Person May Think You’re Desperate
One of the obvious reasons why you should never force anyone to talk to you is because it makes you look more desperate than you might be. One thing about desperation is that it can look unappealing. To top it off, it could also be taken advantage of.
Do not want a relationship so much that you lose your self-respect. If you look too desperate, the person might turn away from you and run away. Give every relationship time to blossom; do not force growth. Forced growth always turns out to be stunted.
6. The Person Most Probably Prefers Your Presence Than An Interaction
When most people make mistakes or have problems, they just want you to listen to them. Most people just want a relieving and assuring hug that encourages them to cry their hearts out. When people go through loss, your words don’t make much impact on them. This is because, no matter what you say, you can’t change their reality.
7. The Person Sees You As A Furniture
A good reason why you should never force anyone to talk to you is because the person might see you as furniture. Why furniture? You might ask: furniture doesn’t do its own will. No matter where you go, your furnitures doesn’t move an inch. They will always maintain the position you kept them for as long as you keep it there.
Seeing a person as furniture means the person thinks you have nothing better to do with your time than to wait for him or her to talk to you. The person might attend to other people and keep you for the last. Even though he or she later gives you the time of his day, he does it very briefly.
8. The Person Doesn’t Meet Your Emotional Needs
We all have emotional needs and those who meet them are those we would often like to spend our time with. An important reason why you should never force anyone to talk to you is because the person doesn’t meet your emotional needs. This can cause you to be frustrated. And frustration can either make you let go in the end or reduce your self esteem drastically.
9. You Deserve To Have A Good Measure Of Self Esteem
Another good reason why you should never force anyone to talk to you is because you deserve better. You deserve to have healthy self-esteem. Most times, in a one-sided relationship, you may be compelled to think you’re a bother to the person. This shows you have to respect yourself more. And to do this, you have to change what you think about yourself.
The truth is, however you treat yourself, those around you may end up treating you like that. It will take someone who sees you better than you see yourself to treat you better. Do not sacrifice yourself for someone who couldn’t care less. Unfortunately, many end up doing the exact opposite when in search of love.
10. Love Cannot Be Forced
True love cannot be forced and this is a true reason why you should never force anyone to talk to you. Love blooms when it is gardened properly and intentionally. For this to happen, both parties must be committed to each other. You cannot truly love someone by forcing them to do your bidding. That is pure manipulation and the person will never feel loved by you.
11. You Lose Your Focus
When you start chasing feelings that are not reciprocated in any way, you lose focus. You lose focus from doing the right things. You might end up neglecting those who truly care about you. Not only that, you might lose focus on your work, self-care and ambitions. This is something most people end up regretting when the scales finally fall off their eyes.
It’s not a bad thing to like someone, but not at your own detriment. Always consider that there is already love in your life before you set out in search of it. Don’t take for granted the good people and things in your life. A lot of people have their flaws but those who stick to you despite yours should always be appreciated.
12. The Person Clearly Doesn’t Need You
This is clearly a case of importance; most people only relate with those they need or will need in the future. One of the most important reasons why you should never force anyone to talk to you is because the person truly doesn’t need you. It’s as simple as that: if you are needed by someone, that person will talk to you no matter what.
13. It Can Be Mentally Draining
A good reason why you should never force anyone to talk to you is that it can be mentally draining. It takes more from you than it gives, leaving you so drained and tired. Once you get drained, you might start behaving out of character. This could even lead you to end up using manipulation to get the person to talk to you. Using manipulation doesn’t translate true feelings.
Conclusion
It’s never ideal to force anyone to talk to you, it makes the person repulsed by you. And instead of coming closer, the person drifts farther away from you. Never force anyone to talk to you because for some people, no matter how much you explain or express yourself to them, it makes no difference. Learn to love yourself more; this is a better way to attract better associations or relationships to yourself.
A famous quote by Pastor T. D. Jakes states as followed, “There are people who can walk away from you… let them walk. I don’t want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you… Your destiny is never tied to anybody.”
Another amazingly true quote is from Shannon L. Alder, who said, “Never chase a person who doesn’t know your worth because the moment you catch him, you will always feel you were never good enough.