This, no doubt, is a common question that arises after the wreckage of a relationship due to cheating. Everyone wants to know the answer to this question, especially when it seems that after many days or months, the person cheated on is still remembering his/her ex. They wonder if their ex ever misses them at all or is just totally comfortable without them.
First, we acknowledge that this is a complex question that seems impossible to answer in the affirmative or negative, yet we cannot deny the fact that there are visible signs that cheaters do miss their exes for many different reasons.
These reasons may stem from unresolved feelings, the fear of being alone or never finding a willing partner, or the desire to reconnect with their ex.
Cheating is a pretty heavy blow to the gut and a deal-breaker in many relationships. It isn’t just about the act; the emotional betrayal that comes with cheating can leave a big scar, causing a greater emotional and sometimes physical scar that may not fully heal.
After all is said and done or after ending things with such a person, cheaters may find themselves nostalgic for their ex and begin wondering if they miss their ex. So, the question, Do cheaters miss their ex? is a plaguing one and a tough pill to swallow.
We may not provide all the answers to this question; however, our focus in this article is to attempt to answer it. In doing so, we will explore the psyche of cheaters, clarify several misconceptions about cheating, and then head out to explain a few of the signs that show whether or not a cheater may miss their ex.
So grab your chair, cup of tea, or coffee and dig in. Let’s go!
In all honesty, the answer to ‘Do cheaters miss their ex?’ is not straightforward and very hard to generalize because of the uniqueness of most relationships. Under normal circumstances, a few behaviors might give us an insight into the life of a cheating partner and help us ascertain whether or not he/she misses their ex.
But first, let’s examine the types of cheaters.
Types of cheaters
There are two main cheating characters: the serial cheater and the one-time mistake cheater. Therefore, for a cheater to miss an ex, it depends on what led to the act, as not everyone would agree cheating is a mistake.
For instance, if a cheating partner cheats unintentionally and quickly wants to make amends, he/she will put in the effort to make up or reach out to their partner. On the other hand, some cheaters may not miss their ex, especially if they cheated for a reason. Such people may not even feel any remorse for their actions; they only feel bad that they were caught in it. This type of cheater will gladly move on to a new relationship with the next available person that appeals to them without so much as a second glance.
Misconceptions about cheating
There have been several misconceptions about cheating that have birthed different philosophies, theories, and ideas about the act, so let’s deal with the misconceptions involved with a cheating partner.
Myth #1: Cheaters lack remorse or regrets
One of the most persuasive notions about cheaters is that they don’t feel regret or remorse. Oftentimes, people feel cheaters are heartless individuals. I do not know of a single person who has been cheated on and who feels the cheater is a good person. On the contrary, the cheaters are the demons and devils who are not content with what they have.
While this is a more complex assumption because it is often untrue, people hang on to it in a bid to validate the immense emotional pain caused by the betrayal of their partners. Meanwhile, this is not in any way meant to exonerate or justify cheating. It’s bad and shouldn’t be indulged in. Yet we’ve noticed that most times after the thrill of their affair wears off, they might begin to come back to their senses and seek forgiveness.
Myth #2: Cheating is always about the physical desire for sex
Another common assumption is that cheating is always about the physical desire for sex. While this might be true, there are a variety of reasons for cheating, some of which may include emotional validation, reminiscing about old memories, or the peace that comes from being with a person who truly knows them. This is a ridiculous reason for cheating.
Myth #3: Cheaters never deserve forgiveness
Finally, another huge misconception about cheating is that a cheater never deserves forgiveness. This one is on a personal level because missing an ex may cause cheaters to seek forgiveness. While we understand it is difficult to forgive a cheater, we encourage forgiveness to be given where necessary.
This does not mean you immediately accept the cheater back into your life and continue as if nothing ever happened. That would be living in denial. If you must move on with a cheater, ensure they’ve repented.
Signs That Show a Cheater Misses their Ex
Here are a few signs that show a cheater misses their ex:
Sign 1: They talk about their exes all the time
Do cheaters miss their ex? Yes, because the name of their ex doesn’t leave their mouth. This is the first sign that cheaters miss their ex.
Cheaters may often find pleasure in talking about their ex with a new lover or friends. They would highlight certain characteristics and lovely memories they have, either positively or negatively. This could indicate they have unresolved feelings for their ex.
They may realize the void the absence of the ex has created even in a new relationship, especially when they do not click with a new partner in the same way they did with an ex.
Sign 2: They become emotionally withdrawn from their new partner
Do cheaters miss their ex? Yes. Here’s a second reason for the answer: A cheater may become emotionally withdrawn in a current relationship, which could be a sign that he or she has not forgotten and moved on.
They find themselves unable to do things with their current partner, forget important details about their new lover, or refuse to let them into their minds and emotions.
They might often dismiss the new partner with comments like, ‘You don’t understand how I feel’, ‘You were not there from the beginning,’ and other stuff like that.
They would do things without the knowledge of their current partners, and may even go as far as calling or texting the partner they cheated on with their current news or situation.
Sign 3: They stalk their ex on social media
This sign is among the top favorites for the answer to the question, ‘Do cheaters miss their ex?’ When a cheater begins to stalk an ex on Instagram, Twitter, or Facebook, wanting to know where they are and what they’ve done or are doing, it shows they still miss their ex.
Also, excessively stalking them on social media or keeping tabs on their current lifestyle suggests they are still emotionally involved. On a more serious note, pondering whether or not the ex you cheated on misses you are most times not healthy. Sometimes it’s best to let it go and move on.
Sign 4: They do things to make their Ex Jealous
This is a sneaky sign that a cheater misses their ex. They begin to make Facebook posts or use Instagram captions to make their ex jealous. This is often done to get their ex’s interest back because they still miss their ex. They’ve probably tried the no-contact rule and it’s not working and now they’re exploring other ways to win their ex’s interest.
If you notice a cheater always trying to talk down on their ex before you and yet goes online to make posts that suggest they are seeking attention from their ex, whether it looks indirect or a little bit offensive, then it’s likely they’re still missing their ex. It could probably be a healing process, and wouldn’t mind reconnecting with their ex if they showed back interest.
Sign 5: They compare their current partner with their ex
A sign that shows whether a cheater misses his or her ex is that they compare the current partner with their ex. Some cheaters may not necessarily miss their partners, but a moment or a certain intimacy. He or she thinks of that moment with nostalgia and hopes to have it again.
Additionally, there will always be something the ex did better than the current partner. They may even end up verbally or emotionally abusing the current partner because they feel he or she is not up to the standard of the ex.
Have you not heard some cheating men say things like, ‘Nobody cooks like Dora,’ or ‘Ellen will never forget to pay the light bills.’ Or haven’t you heard some cheating women say, ‘Dan will never beat me; the only thing he did wrong was cheat on me’?
These are some very clear signs that show cheating men and women miss their exes.
The Bottomline
As we bring this article to a close, it becomes clear that we cannot conclusively answer the question, Do cheaters miss their ex? This is because many of the signs mentioned can also be associated with people who exit a relationship without the involvement of cheating.
Like we pointed out at the beginning, each situation is unique, but we hope this article has helped you see cheating in a clearer light than before.
Conclusively, each individual should decide whether or not they want to go back to their cheating ex. We say this because most cheating exes will come back to their partners not because they are sorry for cheating and the emotional damage it caused but because they miss them.
In this case, it is up to the cheated partner to determine the reason for the return of the ex and act in a way that will not bring further pain and scars. It might be better to move on and start anew.
However, we can all agree on this one fact: cheaters could miss their ex.
