If you’re reading this, it’s either you have a suspicion, have been through a relationship that ended because of infidelity or, rarely, you just want to know for the knowledge, to give advice or to use knowledge for fortification in the future. Regardless of your motive, you’ve found your answer. If you want to know, “How can you tell if your boyfriend has slept with someone else?” you’re not alone.
Trust, communication and mutual respect are the three pivots that hold any and every relationship together. At the slightest deviation from these, doubt will make its entrance, making you wonder if your partner is loyal. Here we are going to look at what started as behavioral changes, followed by physical evidence and emotional distance, all backed up with reputable sources and statistics to serve as a comprehensive guide.
We have equivocally dissected the points into 10 ways how you can tell if your boyfriend has slept with someone else.
10 Signs To Know If Your Boyfriend Has Slept With Someone Else
If you’re concerned that your boyfriend is going to sleep with someone else, then you need to approach the situation from a clear and focused state of mind. Here are 10 clues that he may have already cheated or be on the verge of cheating, helping you figure out whether or not your suspicions are warranted—and how to confront him if they indeed are.
Behavioral Changes
1. Unusual Secretiveness
One of the first signs of how you can tell if your boyfriend has slept with someone else  will be an overprotective behavior that he may adopt regarding his phone. He may even go as far as changing passwords frequently or deleting all his messages on a regular, but subtle, basis.
A study was conducted and published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, which revealed that people who engage in infidelity altogether have higher levels of secrecy associated with their actions, along with deceit to cover their trails. That secrecy does not just occur through digital communication; it will also reflect upon other areas of his life, apparently as he becomes more private about where he is going or who he is spending time with than ever before.
2. Sudden Changes in Routine
A sudden change in your boyfriend’s schedule could indicate that something is up. If he starts working late all of a sudden, it’s time to get suspicious. If he’s jetting off on unexpected trips and telling you that he “can’t make it” when you ask him to take you along, get concerned.
According to research by the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, changes in routine and unexplained absences are the most frequently reported suspicious behaviors by people who have been cheated on. Sometimes those routine changes include new hobbies or interests your man inexplicably developed after years of being uninterested or outright averse. Or maybe he starts socializing more but becomes much less interested in having you join him.
Physical Evidence
3. Unexplained Physical Marks
Physical signs can be an indication of infidelity. If you find unexplained scratches, bite marks, or lipstick stains, that is a red flag. You may also smell lingering unfamiliar perfume scents, come across other belongings that aren’t yours or find them left in your home.
4. Changes in Personal Hygiene
One should be wary when there is an abrupt alteration of the standards of body cleanliness. If he begins showering immediately he gets home, putting on new perfume or having a documented effort in grooming himself, do not relent; he’s trying to pamper another woman.
A study conducted in the Archives of Sexual Behavior shows that infidelity results in people who are involved in it paying a lot of attention to grooming to attract the new partner. These changes may not necessarily be in the line of hygiene or cleanliness, but in other aspects of life whereby an individual has suddenly brought drastic changes. Such example, where he was previously ailing, he or she now exercises or takes care of personal hygiene, in contrast to previous times when it was an issue of no concern to him or her.
5. Decreased Intimacy
In this case, emotional and physical intimacy inevitably suffer when a partner cheats. If your boyfriend is pulling away, does not want to be intimate, does not want to talk, or seems uninterested, these are signs on how you can tell if he is sleeping with someone else.
The sources of National Opinion Research Center showed that if the partners lost emotional connection and distance themselves physically, then the probability of facing infidelity issues would be high. This detachment might show up as aloofness or disinterest in wanting to engage in intimate activities together or, during communication, one avoids or averts eye contact.
6. Increased Irritability And Criticism
Infidels tend to transfer their shame and anger to their life partner. If your boyfriend has turned grumpy, complaintive and noisy, this might be his way of processing the guilt.
In their web page, the Gottman Institute was keen to point out that criticism and defensiveness are some of the behaviors that one will display when involved in infidelity. This irritability can at one point erupt into constant disagreement over petty issues, and in this case, your boyfriend will appear to have a tendency to retaliate without much provocation.
Financial Changes
7. Unexplained Expenses
Cheating at times can be traced, wherein the physical aspect is not the only thing involved but also the monetary. In this case, fluency of specific amounts debited, emergence of charges on the credit cards, which are difficult to explain, and high spending and withdrawals that one did not plan may be something to consider.
A survey carried out by the National Endowment for Financial Education revealed that 31% of the people who were involved in extra-marital affairs also engaged in hiding financial aspects about their affair. This might comprise expenditure such as gift purchases, accommodation, or meals that are considered as non-necessities or fall outside his common expenditure routine.
8. Secretive About Money
There could be a possibility to spend on someone else, and if your boyfriend hides something considering money, then it could be a sign. This could also incorporate concealing the receipts or even a sudden change of guard over his money. This could be a clear sign on how you can tell if your boyfriend is sleeping with someone else.
Communication Patterns
 9. Changes in Communication Style
Any changes you observe in the way your boyfriend communicates can be a sign. If he starts avoiding questions, especially personal ones, giving short or unclear responses, or avoiding some topics in particular, it could be that he is concealing something.
Scientists from the University of California, Berkeley, provided research dealing with certain shifts of the communication model and stated that these shifts point to some interaction problems, including affairs.
10. Overcompensating with Affection
In some cases, cheaters go to the extreme of affection, being more caring than usual or giving more gifts. When your boyfriend pays you too many compliments, brings you too many gifts or suddenly becomes overly attentive, it may be a way of making up for the guilt. This may not be a bad thing; however, one needs to determine if the presented behavior is constant or if the person has turned over a new leaf.
Ways To Self-organize Your Concerns
There are several ways to self-organize your concerns; they include:
1. Open Communication
To begin, you both need to sit down and discuss with your boyfriend about the possibility that he has cheated on you. Do not start describing the matter with demands or allegations. Override such thoughts and sit him down, asking him what happened?
People need to talk to one another; they need to listen to each other in order to hear their problems and concerns as well. This conversation should be attempted from the viewpoint of open-mindedness and the primary goal should be to listen to each other’s feelings or concerns that made you arrive at that decision.
2. Seek Professional Help
In some instances, it is very important to work with the services of a professional to treat cases of adultery. It might be best to consult couples therapy or counseling in order to deal with this problematic period. It may be best to seek help from a therapist so both of you can talk to them about what is upsetting you and come up with a solution. Concerning the effectiveness of couples therapy, the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy points out that the process leads to improvement of satisfaction of the relationship and the reconstruction of trust. It is also critical since a professional can help one deal with the feelings and give direction on what to do regarding the dynamics of the relationship.
Final Words
To begin with, trust and communication are always the basis for any relationship; hence, dealing with infidelity carefully will allow you to make correct decisions concerning your further partnership.
Whether that be through acknowledging the behaviors changing, tangible signs or them being emotionally distant, the signs can help people leave and then get the recovery that is needed. Always bear in mind that the purpose is not only to attain the verdict of their justice but also a plan compatible with the best interests of one’s mental well-being and happiness.
